Friday, August 24, 2012

Am I glad that I am me?


Analytical Instrumenation class... 11:20 AM 24th Aug 2012...



    A girl listens to the lecture. I notice something written on her pouch " I'm glad I'm me!". That raises 2 questions: Am I? Are we? I never really gave much thought to it. What part of myself I call me? Appearance? Knowledge? Character? All the above? I have no idea.

    But I can answer this question. What differentiates me from others? A constant feeling that forces me to move forward towards my goal. This feeling defines me. Am I glad? NO... I'm indifferent. I'm OK with what I am for now. I'm not satisfied and I strongly believe that I'll never be. Enough about question 1.

    Are we glad with what we are? What are the parameters to be considered in judging whether a person is happy or not? People say that these parameters vary from person to person and is inappropriate to judge a person to be happy or not, based on the parameters that we consider for judging ourselves. Thats what people say. What i think? I think thats BS.

    Whenever I see happy people, I consider them trapped inside the matrix. I believe that everyone lives inside their own matrix believing that they are happy. Happiness is a myth and people who believe in myth and lies, live in the matrix.

  
             So, Am I glad?

                        Thats a stupid question...

Friday, August 17, 2012

Shit Just Happens


This is RPS Deepan, it is 4:46 AM. I was sleeping in the hall. My dad comes home at 4:00 AM and accidentally disturbs the power cable to my computer. Some other day he could have walked past it being undisturbed, but not today. The alert sound of the inverter wakes me up. Some other day i could have slept through it, but not today. So, i come online and write a post about it. I could think think that the post is meaningless, save it as a draft and forget about it. If i dont click the publish button the world will never know about this event that happened in my life. These are about today's events.

If the developer who developed the CM9 build of ICS for SGS+ had spent a little more time to add USB host controller driver to it, i would have started up with my project 2 days ago and the last 2days could have been completely different and this blog wouldn't exist. I can go on like this. Every single event that occurs is random. We are here today in this world looking at our tablet screens due to an infinite number of random events; a series of random events. 

My point is, there is no point, in living this random life unless there is structured pursuit of a goal. Sure we evolved from protozoa to human beings due to random series of events. But think about all the scientific inventions and breakthroughs. These things dint happen randomly. Scientists and Engineers spent infinite sleepless nights in pursuit of individual goals through an organized lifestyle, hardwork and dedication, and in that process they have served the Humanity. Nothing would have been possible if one guy dint spend endless days to think about locomotion and invent the wheel. 

I sometimes used to think that my life is not organized, that i dont have control over things i learn, practice and i leave a lot to chances. But I was wrong. When i look back, 3 years ago, i wanted this exact same life, where i'm good in scripting, hardware hacking, mobile development. May be the details are a little different but I am living a dream. I do have an automatic goal seeking mechanism which keeps my head in the game all the time. I just forget about it some times but deep down, i always knew.

" I think shit just happens..." --- Nicholas Cage, Knowing.


Wednesday, August 15, 2012

What next?


Hi!

Its 16th aug 2012. This is RPS Deepan and yeah my first non-technical post. Dont really know where to start; got a lot on my plate. This has always been my problem. I dont know whether i'm good at many things but i know that i'm interested in a lot of things. Right now i want to do 4 or 5 things like, continuing the book "Understanding Linux Kernel", watching the video tutorial on Bash Scripting, working on voice recognition in Android for my college project, learning to add usb host capability to the ICS build (Cyanogen CM9) for my smartphone SGS+ (should have bought SGS, my mistake or Nexus), prepare for GATE examination (Analytical Instrumentation, for this weeek) and yeah, complete my college work (graphs and trace sheets...).  You see my problem? 




But i am not really confused. I have been dealing with this problem since i started college and i have a gud idea what to do. What I need is an organized life. It is easy to say but extremely difficult to follow. Lets say i start with "Bash Scripting", then the next 8 hours or so are spent on it; i just cant let it go once i get my hands on it. Anyway this is my only solution and i will try to try it.